Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 25)

View All Murphys Laws

Whenever you need to stop at a light to put on makeup, every light will be green.

Autos Murphy’s Laws

Everybody wants to peel his own banana.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

The more time you spend in reporting on what you are doing, the less time you have to do anything. Stability is achieved when you spend all your time doing nothing but reporting on the nothing you are doing.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

There are 32 points to the compass, meaning that there are 32 directions in which a spoon can squirt grapefruit; yet, the juice almost invariably flies straight into the human eye.

Murphy’s Laws

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

Murphy’s Laws War

The volume of paper expands to fill the available briefcases.

(1938 – ) U.S. governor (California) & politician
Murphy’s Laws Work

If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously with a compelling distraction.


Murphy’s Laws Situations

Good parking places are always on the other side of the street.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Things

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Murphy’s Laws Things

The higher up the organization, the fewer people appreciate Murphy's Law.

Murphy’s Laws

If you leave the room, you're elected.

Murphy’s Laws

A dropped object will fall with an acceleration of 32 feet per second per second, and if it is your wallet, it will make every effort to land in a public toilet.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Accidents Murphy’s Laws Problems

Only someone who understands something absolutely can explain it so no one else can understand it.

Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Understanding

Even paranoids have enemies.

Murphy’s Laws People

Research is reading two books that have never been read in order to write a third that will never be read.

Books Communication Intelligence Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

The number of laws will expand to fill the publishing space available.

Murphy’s Laws

Smart bombs have bad days too.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.

Murphy’s Laws

In approaching a double door, you will always go to the one door that is locked, pull when you should have pushed, and push when the sign says pull.

Murphy’s Laws Things

The “Consumer Report” on the item will come out a week after you’ve made your purchase.
Corollaries: 1. The one you bought will be rated “unacceptable.”. 2. The one you almost bought will be rated “best buy.”

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

A fool and his money are soon elected.

Elections/Voting Fools Intelligence Murphy’s Laws