Subject: Places » America (Page 8)

I’m so American that I’m barely informed enough to have an opinion, but entitled enough to yell about it.

American comedian
America Places

America is a melting pot, the people at the bottom get burned while all the scum floats to the top.

American folksinger & activist
America Places

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight.

America Food/Drink Places

In modern America, anyone who attempts to write satirically about the events of the day finds it difficult to concoct a situation so bizarre that it may not actually come to pass while the article is still on the presses.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
America Communication Reading/Writing

America never lost a war or won a peace conference.

(1886 – 1969) American journalist & humorist
America Conflict Places War

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
America Places Science/Weather

The Americans are a funny lot; they drink whiskey to keep them warm, then they put ice in it to make it cool; then they put some sugar in it to make it sweet and then they put a slice of lemon in it to make it sour, then they say, “Here’s to you” and drink it themselves.

(1904 – 1976) Indian politician
America People Places

What middle class? … there's only seven people left in the middle class – who cares about them?

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
America People Places

Americans are like the straight, white man of cultures.

(1978 – ) Australian comedian, writer & actress
America People Places

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.

(1922 – 2007) American novelist
America Emotions Fear Government School

In America there are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Activities America Places Travel

Two hundred million Americans, and there ain’t two good catchers among ‘em.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
America Baseball People Sports

If this country was a person it would be a used car salesman with a flamethrower. – America

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
America Places

California is a nice place to live – if you happen to be an orange.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
America Places

In America, your work determines your marks; in Soviet Russia, Marx determines your work!

(1951 – ) Soviet-American comedian
America Places

America is the only place where people go hunting on a full stomach.

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director
America Places

Getting worried there might not be enough talent in America to accommodate all these singing shows.

(1974 – ) American comedian
America Places Success

You can find your way across this country using burger joints the way a navigator uses stars.

(1934 – 1997) journalist
Activities America Autos Places Travel

Canadians are Americans with no Disneyland.

(1937 – 2012) New Zealand author
America Canada Places