Subject: Sports (Page 41)

Golf: A game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill adapted for the purpose

(1856 – 1924) 28th U.S. president & politician
Golf Sports

Those trees seem to grow every year…

British professional golfer & commentator
Golf Misspokements Sports

Turner pulls into second with a sun-blown double.

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

You know that creepy-looking guy you stare at two seats behind you, thinking, who would come to a movie by himself? That's me.

(1969 – ) Canadian ice hockey player & executive
Hockey People Self Sports

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Activities Golf Sports

Tee your ball high… the air offers less resistance than dirt.

(1940 – ) professional golfer
Golf Sports

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns.

Golf Sports

I've always felt we weren't physical enough on the back line. Now there's a no-parking sign in front of our net.

hockey general manager
Hockey Sports

We're looking forward to building the type of team the Rangers are able to buy.

Canadian hockey player, coach & general manager
Hockey Sports

Blind people come to the park just to hear him pitch.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

The front wheel crosses the finish line, closely followed by the back wheel.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

Golfing excellence goes hand in hand with alcohol, as many an Open and Amateur champion has shown.

British golf writer & commentator
Alcohol Food/Drink Golf Sports

There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Problems Sports

If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast… if God wants to play through, let him.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
God Golf Sports

He can do it the hard way, get beat up for 12 rounds and end up in the hospital. Or, he can do it the easy way, get hit on the chin and go to sleep.

American boxer
Boxing Sports

I wish you were a statue and I were a pigeon.

Stephen Gascoigne (1878 – 1942) Australian sports fan & heckler
Sports

They do a lot of talking, but I'm not sure they actually understand each other.

Canadian hockey player
Hockey Sports

That slow motion doesn't show how fast the ball was traveling.

Australian cricketer & commentator
Misspokements Sports

It must be the body. It’s chiseled out of marshmallows.

American hockey player
Hockey Sports

I have never found anything, including divorce and a sexual harassment suit, more frustrating.

(1970 – ) American actor, producer & stand up comedian
Golf Sports

Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.

(1770 – 1850) English Romantic poet
Golf Sports