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Subject: Sports (Page 57)

Tommy (Lasorda) will eat anything, as long as you pay for it.

Joe Torre

American baseball player, manager & executive

Fast bowlers are quick. Just watch this – admittedly it is in slow motion.

Ian Chappell

Australian cricketer

Misspokements Sports Cricket

Sure, luck means a lot in football; not having a good quarterback is bad luck.

Don Shula

(1930 – ) American football player & coach

Football Sports Luck Quarterbacks

Yes, the guy can score you 40 goals… what I don't want is him causing 60.

Terry Crisp

Canadian hockey player & broadcaster

Hockey Sports On rookie Alex Selivanov

I reckon I tried everything on the old apple, but salt and pepper and chocolate sauce topping.

Gaylord Perry

American baseball pitcher

Baseball Sports On ‘doctoring’ the ball Pitching Spitballs

For those of us who are baseball fans and agnostics, the [Baseball] Hall of Fame is as close to a religious experience as we may ever get.

Bill Bryson

American author

Baseball Sports Hall of Fame

Ah, isn’t that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

Harry Carpenter

British sports commentator

Misspokements Sports [The "coxswain" directs the rowers] Rowing

If you can’t make the putts and can’t get the man in from second on the bottom of the ninth, you’re not going to win enough football games in this league, and that’s the problem we had today.

Sam Rutigliano

football coach

Football Misspokements Sports On why his team lost

Mexicans are always tough with lots of heart; Koreans raw and gritty; the poor British tend to stand up straight and take it on the chops, bleeding almost before the opening bell.

Stephen Brunt

Canadian sportswriter

Boxing People Sports boxers British Koreans Mexicans

Being a decathlete is like having ten girlfriends. You have to love them all, and you can't afford losing one.

Daley Thompson

British Olympic decathlon champion

Misspokements Sports Decathlon

Jacques Lafitte is as close to Surer as Surer is to Lafitte.

Murray Walker

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator

Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Coaches who start listening to fans wind up sitting next to them.

Johnny Kerr

professional basketball player & coach

Basketball Sports Fans

The Yankees are only interested in one thing, and I don’t know what that is.

Luis Polonia

professional baseball player

Baseball Misspokements Sports

If a caddie can help you, you don't know how to play golf.

Dan Jenkins

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter

Golf Sports Caddies

I told her they must be all sold out.

Wade Belak

Canadian hockey player

Hockey Sports On his response when his mother said she couldn't find his sweater for sale in a souvenir shop

Is that the best game you ever pitched?

An unknown sportscaster

Baseball Misspokements Sports To Don Larsen who had just pitched a perfect game

I'll go another 15 rounds with Holmes if Howard will quit announcing football!

Randall “Tex” Cobb

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor

Boxing Sports About commentator Howard Cosell

All quitters are good losers.

Bob Zuppke

German-American football coach

Football Sports Losing Quitters

The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf.

Wells's Virtual Law

Appearance Body Golf Murphy’s Laws Sports H.G. Wells

You may be right, but it hasn’t reached his legs yet!

Bill Shankly

Scottish football player & manager

Sports After a scout told him about a young player who “has football in his blood.” Soccer

There’s someone warming up in the bullpen, but he’s obscured by his number.

Jerry Coleman

(1924 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer