Subject: Sports (Page 80)

Oh, hell, if you win twenty games they want you to do it every year.

professional baseball player
Baseball Sports

I know being a linesman is a thankless job, especially with guys like me around.

American professional tennis player
Sports

Spencer’s running across field calling out, ‘Come inside me, come inside me.’

New Zealand rugby player & commentator
Misspokements Sports

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Sure, luck means a lot in football; not having a good quarterback is bad luck.

(1930 – ) American football player & coach
Football Sports

I want to keep fighting because it is the only thing that keeps me out of the hamburger joints. If I don’t fight, I’ll eat this planet.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Eating Food/Drink Sports

As I remember it, the bases were loaded.

professional baseball player
Baseball Misspokements Sports

God invented football so grown men would have something to do between wars.

(1929 – ) American author & sportswriter
Conflict Football Sports War

I wish I had put ballet shoes on him and not boxing gloves.

Boxing Occupations Sports

Never think of your car as a cold machine, but as a hot-blooded horse.

Argentinian auto racer
Auto racing Autos Sports Things

There was so much barging and shoving; it was like trying to get into a Glasgow pub on a Saturday night.

Scottish distance runner
Sports

An almost inexorable baseball law: A Red Sox ship with a single leak will always find a way to sink; no team is worshipped with such a perverse sense of fatality.

American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

My head looks like ET gone wrong.

English boxer
Boxing Sports

Lunch is on me.

(1969 – ) Canadian ice hockey player & executive
Hockey Money Sports

The best time to play a freshman is when he is a junior.

Minnesota football coach
Football Sports

I refuse to call a 47-year-old white-haired man ’Sparky.’

baseball umpire
Baseball Sports

There definitely needs to be water on the sidelines for these players, but I also had some Gatorade just in case they were allergic to the water or vice versa.

(1936 – ) American football coach & television announcer
Alcohol Health Misspokements Sports

Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it.

(1918 – 2001) American sportswriter, commentator & actor
Football Sports

It is so long it’s the first time I’ve had to take into account the curvature of the earth.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

When I got up I stuck to my plan… stumbling forward and getting hit in the face.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports

I don’t know what I will do in October. I’ve never hit in this month before. I’m usually playing basketball in October.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports