Author: Anonymous Page 129

“We must hurry,” said Tom Swiftly.

Tom Swifties

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

Appearance Body Fat

Tolerance: Another word for indifference.

Characteristics Definitions

Hanging: A suspended sentence.

Definitions

“Your fly is undone,” was Tom’s zippy rejoinder.

Tom Swifties

Psychology: The science that tells you what you already know in words you can’t understand.

Definitions Science/Weather

Nursery: Bawl room.

Definitions

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

Death

Eccentric: A man too rich to be called crazy.

Definitions People

White Supremacists: The most convincing argument against the theory of white racial superiority.

Beliefs Definitions Intelligence People

Vice: A function to keep virtue within reasonable bounds.

Definitions

Women: Can't live with 'em – can't live with 'em.

People Women

I won’t miss it one aorta!

Malaprops

Epitaph: A monumental lie.

Death Definitions

Thanks: A down payment on the next favor.

Definitions

Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you’re going to get or how long it will last.

Sex

“Some day, people will be able to file lawsuits against computers,” said Tom soothingly.

Tom Swifties

Slander: To lie, or tell the truth, about someone.

Communication Definitions

Ventriloquist: A man with a dummy who always talks to himself.

Definitions

Antique: An object that has made a round trip to the attic.

Definitions Things

Imagination: What puts men in asylums unless they are crazy enough to put it down on paper or canvas.

Definitions