Author: Anonymous Page 68

Armor: A knight gown.

Clothing Definitions

Satan: The scarecrow in the religious cornfield.

Beliefs Definitions Religion

Hot Pants: Breeches of promise.

Appearance Clothing Definitions

Tougher than a boiled owl.

Expressions

Hamper: A wicker container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothing.

Clothing Definitions

You could have blown me over with a feather.

Misspokements

Taxation: The process by which money is collected from the people to pay the salaries of the men who do the collecting.

Definitions Government Taxes

“I find you guilty,” said the judge with conviction.

Tom Swifties

Durable Goods: Those that last longer than the time payments.

Definitions Things

He was from Thailand or some other erotic place.

Malaprops Places

He was lookin' at me like a country mule lookin at a freight train.

Expressions

Arabs wear turbines on their heads.

Clothing Malaprops

Eating humble crow

Misspokements

Cat bathing is a martial art.

Animals Cats

Hypochondriac: One who can’t leave well-enough alone.

Definitions Health

Make money and the whole nation will conspire to call you a gentleman.

Characteristics Money

Too many skeletons in her background

Mixed metaphors

Booby Trap: A brassiere.

Definitions

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it.

Intelligence Memory

“We had trouble with the propulsion systems for those moon flights”, said the NASA engineer apologetically.

Tom Swifties

Canada is like your attic, you forget that it's up there, but when you go, it's like "Oh man, look at all this great stuff!"

Canada Places