Author: Anonymous Murphy's Law

No name, no matter how simple, can be correctly understood over the phone.

When there are sufficient funds in the checking account, checks take two weeks to clear; when there are insufficient funds, checks clear overnight.

On successive charts of the same organization the number of boxes will never decrease.

When a broken appliance is demonstrated to the repairman, it will work perfectly.

Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day’s work.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.

If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.

A failure will not appear till a unit has passed final inspection.

You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, and that is sufficient.

A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works.

The more cordial the buyer’s secretary, the greater the odds that the competition already has the order.

If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

Murphy’s Law never fails except when you try to demonstrate it.

If mathematically you end up with the incorrect answer, try multiplying by the page number.

Never step in anything soft.

The repairman will never have seen a model quite like yours before.

An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.

Exceptions prove the rule… and wreck the budget.

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.