Author: Dorothy Parker Page 2

I wish you could have heard that pretty crash Beauty and the Beast made when, with one sweeping, liquid gesture, I tossed it out of my twelfth-story window.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

Crude is the name of Robert Hyde’s first novel; it is also a criticism of it.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Communication Reviews/Criticism

Where does she find them?

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Insults

I went into the Plymouth Theater a comparatively young woman, and I staggered out of it three hours later, twenty years older, haggard and broken with suffering.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

There has been but one sweet, misty interlude in my [insomnia]; that was the evening I fell into a dead dreamless slumber brought on by the reading of a book called Appendicitis.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

If you don't knit bring a good book.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
People Self

“House Beautiful” is the play lousy.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

Tell him I’ve been too f**king busy – or vice versa.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Activities Sex Situations Time

Seventy-two suburbs in search of a city.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Places

The only thing I didn’t like about The Barretts of Wimpole Street was the play.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism

An admiring drunk to Parker: I simply can’t bear fools.
Parker: Apparently, your mother did not have the same difficulty.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Fools Intelligence

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics Communication

Four be the things I’d been better without;

love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Things

This is on me.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death

Excuse my dust.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Epitaphs Self

She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Acting Reviews/Criticism

The cure for boredom is curiosity; there is no cure for curiosity.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Characteristics Intelligence

This book of essays… has all the depth and glitter of a worn dime.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Reviews/Criticism

That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death Places

That woman speaks eighteen languages, and she can’t say 'No' in any of them.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Communication Insults Intelligence Sex