Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Keyword:
Celebrity
(Page 2)
Give me two years, and I'll make her an overnight star.
Harry Cohn
(1891 – 1958) American president of Columbia Pictures & producer
Success
Time
Celebrity
Overnight star
I performed for the U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay, and signed autographs for people who’ve been gone from America for so long they didn’t realize that I’m not famous.
Mike Birbiglia
(1978 – ) American comedian & writer
Success
Celebrity
Fame
Success for some people, depends on becoming well-known; for others, it depends on never being found out.
Ashleigh Brilliant
(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Success
Celebrity
Celebrity: A person whose name is in everything but the telephone book.
Anonymous
Definitions
Celebrity
The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault.
Henry Kissinger
(1923 – ) German-born diplomat & scholar
Characteristics
Success
Boredom
Celebrity
Andy Warhol made fame more famous.
Fran Lebowitz
(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Success
Andy Warhol
Celebrity
Today’s public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can’t read them either.
Gore Vidal
(1925 – 2012) author, playwright, essayist & screenwriter
Communication
Reading/Writing
Speech
Success
Celebrity
Public figures
People seldom become famous for what they say until after they are famous for what they've done.
Cullen Hightower
(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
People
Speech
Success
Accomplishments
Celebrity
The best fame is a writer’s fame: it’s enough to get a table at a good restaurant, but not enough that you get interrupted when you eat.
Fran Lebowitz
(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Success
Celebrity
Fame
You’re not famous until my mother has heard of you.
Jay Leno
(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Mothers
Success
Celebrity
Fame
Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo, but what you need is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.
Oprah Winfrey
(1954 – ) American television host, actress, producer & philanthropist
People
Situations
Success
Celebrity
Limousines
There are five stages in the life of an actor: Who’s Mary Astor? … Get me Mary Astor… Get me a Mary Astor type… Get me a young Mary Astor… Who’s Mary Astor?
Mary Astor
(1906 – 1987) American actress
Acting
Age
Entertainment
Success
Actors
Celebrity
Being a star has made it possible for me to get insulted in places where the average Negro could never hope to go and get insulted.
Sammy Davis Jr.
(1925 – 1990) American entertainer
Characteristics
Insults
People
Success
Celebrity
Racism
A celebrity is one who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn't know.
H.L. Mencken
(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
People
Success
Celebrity
It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
Robert Benchley
(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Communication
Reading/Writing
Success
Celebrity
I don't want to get so famous to where the guy who shoots me becomes famous.
Michael ‘Geechy Guy’ Cathers
(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian
Conflict
Killing
Success
Celebrity
Fame means absolutely nothing except a good table at a restaurant.
Eileen Atkins
(1934 – ) English actress & occasional screenwriter
Success
Celebrity
Fame
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Napoleon Bonaparte
(1769 – 1821) French general & politician
Success
Time
Celebrity
Glory
No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.
Michael Pritchard
comedian, counselor & speaker
Death
Science/Weather
Success
Wealth
Celebrity
These days a star is anyone who can hold a microphone; a super star is someone who has shaken hands with Lew Grade, and a super-super-star is someone who has refused to shake hands with Lew Grade.
Harry Secombe
(1921 – 2001) Welsh comedian & singer
Success
Celebrity
Lew Grade
Stars
Any idiot can get laid when they’re famous… that’s easy… it’s getting laid when you’re
not
famous that takes some talent.
Kevin Bacon
(1958 – ) American film & theater actor
Sex
Success
Celebrity
Fame
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