Subject: Work (Page 26)

If I’m making millions to put a ball through a hoop, you can’t ever piss me off.

(1975 – ) American comedian, actor & writer
Money Occupations Sports Work

Experimental psychologist: A scientist who pulls habits out of rats.

(1904 – 1974) American author & radio producer
Definitions Occupations Wordplay Work

Seven months ago I could give a single command and 541,000 people would immediately obey it; today I can’t get a plumber to come to my house.

(1934 – 2012) United States Army general
Occupations Success Work

Unemployment: The usual alternative to overwork.

Definitions Work

Those who rise to executive positions lack the qualifications for anything lower.

Murphy’s Laws Work

If you do a job twice, it’s yours.

Murphy’s Laws Work

If you have a choice of selling shoes to ladies or giving birth to a flaming porcupine… look into that second, less painful career.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Situations Work

 If you're a coach, NFL stands for "Not For Long."

professional football & TV commentator
Football Occupations Sports

If they make it illegal to wear the veil at work, bee keepers are going to be furious.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Situations Work

Every employee begins at his level of competence.

Murphy’s Laws Work

When we’re unemployed, we’re called lazy; when the whites are unemployed, it’s called a depression.

(1941 – ) American civil rights activist & Baptist minister
People Situations Work

Should not the Society of Indexers be known as Indexers Society of, The?

(1929 – 2009) British novelist, newspaper columnist & television writer
Occupations Wordplay Work

Sailors ought never to go to church; they ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.

(1866 – 1946) English author
Occupations Work

To err is human; to loaf, Parisian.

(1802 – 1885) French writer
People Places Work