Subject: Age (Page 11)

Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Age Old

Always be nice to those younger than you, because they are the ones who will be writing about you.

(1903 – 1974) English intellectual, literary critic & writer
Age Characteristics Reading/Writing

I have a lot of growing up to do; I realized that the other day inside my fort.

(1969 – ) comedian & actor
Age Characteristics

I feel I can talk with more authority, especially when I say, ‘I don’t know.’

(1921 – 2004) English actor & author
Age Old

The older I grow the more I listen to people who don’t talk much.

Age Communication Old

I was born in 1962… and the room next to me was 1963.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Age People Self

I can tell I’m getting old because my Kindle is turning into a self-help library.

(1982 – ) American actress, stand-up comedian & writer
Age Books Old Reading/Writing

As you grow older, you stand for more and fall for less.

Accidents Age Beliefs Old

Senility: A cleansing of the mental blackboard shortly before class is dismissed.

Age Definitions Old

I have lost friends, some by death… others through sheer inability to cross the street.

(1882 – 1941) English novelist, essayist, publisher & feminist
Accidents Age Death Friends People

Adolescents: People who never seem to realize that one day they will be as dumb as their parents.

Age People Young

I still feel 30, except when I try to run.

(1929 – ) American comedian & comic actor
Activities Age Old

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Friends Intelligence Old People

Senescence begins and middle age ends, the day your descendants outnumber your friends.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Age Old

There are five stages in the life of an actor: Who’s Mary Astor? … Get me Mary Astor… Get me a Mary Astor type… Get me a young Mary Astor… Who’s Mary Astor?

(1906 – 1987) American actress
Acting Age Entertainment Success

If you want to know how old a woman is, ask her sister-in-law.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Age People Women

Adolescence: That period when children feel their parents should be told the facts of life.

Age Definitions

I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
Age Appearance Body

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower or vacuum cleaner.

Age Children Family Learning

If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near forty.

(1965 – ) comedian, actor, screenwriter, television producer & director
Age Appearance People Women

I’m getting pretty worried; my girlfriend hasn’t gotten her period… and she’s already 14.

(1978 – ) American writer & stand-up comedian
Age Girlfriends People