Subject: Appearance » Clothing (Page 3)

The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would not be caught dead in otherwise.

novelist, screenwriter & businessman
Clothing Golf Sports

Sometimes I fall asleep at night with my clothes on; I’m going to have all my clothes made out of blankets.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing Situations Sleep

When you’re gay every party is a bad sweater party.

(1970 –) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing

No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit.

(1891 – 1941) Canadian physician & physiologist
Appearance Clothing Ideas Intelligence

To attract the most attention, a woman should be either nude or wearing something as expensive as getting her nude is going to be.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Appearance Clothing

You'll never find the answer to 'What's the right hat?'

(1941 – ) American singer
Appearance Clothing

Armor: A knight gown.

Clothing Definitions

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war… just a greater emphasis on military apparel.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Clothing Conflict Government Military War

You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Appearance Body Clothing

I went to look for a used car and found my wife's dress in the back seat.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Autos Clothing Sex Wives

When packing for a vacation, take half as much clothing and twice as much money.

Clothing Money Murphy’s Laws

A lady is one who never shows her underwear… unintentionally.

(1893 – 1991) novelist, biographer & playwright
Appearance Characteristics Clothing

This shirt is “dry-clean only”… which means it’s dirty.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Appearance Clothing

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Children Clothing Family Health

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Appearance Body Clothing Women

That top has paid off in free drinks 10 times what I originally paid for it.

(1985 – ) American actress
Clothing TV/Movie Quotes

I had a girlfriend that was so fat she had a dress with a sign on the back saying… Caution Wide Load.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Body Clothing Fat Girlfriends People

I have reached an age when, if someone tells me to wear socks, I don't have to.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Age Clothing Old

Living up to ideals is like doing everyday work with your Sunday clothes on.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Appearance Clothing Life Work

It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.

Activities Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

Liz: Why are you wearing a tux?

Jack: It’s after 6 o’clock Lemon. What am I, a farmer?

(1958 – ) American actor & producer
Appearance Clothing TV/Movie Quotes