Subject: Communication » Language (Page 7)

Why don't they have waiters in waiting rooms?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Language

Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

My teacher used to say I wasn't very observant… to be honest, that was her opinion.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Boy, those French… they have a different word for everything!

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Communication Language

Plagiarize: To take the thought or style of another writer whom one has never, never read.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Reading/Writing

Connoisseur: A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Intelligence Language

My sister has just married a Chinese billionaire… Cha Ching!

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

You say ‘erbs, and we say Herbs… because there’s a f**king ‘H’ in it!

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Communication Language

Profanity: The father tongue.

Communication Definitions Language Speech

Umm, trouble with grammar have I, yes?

Movie character in, Star Wars (Frank Oz)
Communication Language TV/Movie Quotes

Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you're told.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Communication Democracy Language Speech

If something goes wrong at the plant, blame the guy who can't speak English.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Communication Language Situations TV/Movie Quotes

Patience: A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

Me and my wife met at a Castanet class… we clicked.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Marriage Wives

Mouth: In man, the gateway to the soul; in woman, the outlet of the heart.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

You're an old-timer if you can remember when setting the world on fire was a figure of speech.

(1908 – 1980) businessman, humorist
Age Communication Language Old Speech World

I realized I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat.

Communication Health Language Reading/Writing

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

Communication Language

Circus: A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Animals Communication Definitions Fools Language People

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication Facts Language Science/Weather

What do people mean when they say the computer went down on me?

comedian, commentator, radio host, reporter & writer
Computers Language Sex Things