Subject: Communication (Page 71)

Avoid alliteration… always.


Communication Reading/Writing

How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Things Wordplay

It seems pointless to be quoted if one isn’t going to quotable.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Communication

One nice thing about telling a clean joke is there’s a good chance no one’s heard it before.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Communication Entertainment

The splendor of an editor's speech and the splendor of his newspaper are inversely related to the distance between the city in which he makes his speech and the city in which he publishes his paper.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Places Reading/Writing Speech

If you can't answer a man's arguments, all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Communication Speech

A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults.

(1902 – 1994) British-born American trial lawyer & author
Communication Insults

Penicillin: What to give a man who has everything.

Definitions Health Wordplay

Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact.

Mary Anne Evans (1819 – 1880) English novelist, journalist & translator
Communication People Speech

Oratory: The art of making deep noises from the chest sound like important messages from the brain.

Communication Definitions Speech

All of ‘em, any of ‘em that have been in front of me over all these years.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Communication Misspokements

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two.

Communication Wordplay

There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

I got a new job stitching shoes; it was so-so.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Occupations Work

It’s better to be quotable than honest.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
Communication

That woman speaks eighteen languages, and she can’t say 'No' in any of them.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Communication Insults Intelligence Sex

Political speeches are like steer horns: a point here, a point there, and a lot of bull in between.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication Government Politics Speech

The pen is mightier than the sword if the sword is very short, and the pen is very sharp.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Communication Conflict Reading/Writing

Most new books are forgotten within a year, especially by those who borrow them.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Books Communication Time

A woman's preaching is like a dog's walking on his hinter legs; it is not done well; but you are surprised to see it done at all.

(1740 – 1795) Scottish lawyer, diarist & author
Communication People Speech Women

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like “What about lunch?”

fictional character from the book series by A. A. Milne
Communication Eating Language People Speech