Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 10)

My wife says I’m unsophisticated and uncultured, so to prove her wrong, guess where I’m taking her… hint: It starts with “B” and rhymes with “wallet.”

Characteristics Wordplay

There’s nothing to fear but life itself.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Fear Wordplay

Las Vegas is the oasis of outstretched palms.

English boxing journalist & commentator
Boxing Money Sports Wordplay

Obesity is really widespread.

Appearance Fat Wordplay

If I repeatedly stab my cornflakes does that make me a cereal killer?

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Dave drowned; so at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt; well, it’s what he would have wanted.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication Wordplay

I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck, turns out I phoned dial-a-lama.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Communication Wordplay

Tissue: Your daily nosepaper.

Definitions Wordplay

A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

Communication Wordplay

The baby wakes up in the wee wee hours of the morning.

Children Family Wordplay

This bloke said to me: ‘I’m going to attack you with the neck of a guitar;’ I said: ‘Is that a fret?’

(1967 – ) English actor, writer & comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

I sink, therefore I swam.

Activities Communication Wordplay

History is the short trudge from Adam to atom.

(1904 – 1974) American author & radio producer
History Time Wordplay

Incest is relatively boring.

Family Sex Wordplay

If Bing Crosby was great, imagine how good Google Crosby would have been.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
People Wordplay

Take my wife… please!

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Marriage Wives Wordplay

Gigolo: A fee-male.

Definitions Wordplay

At school the other kids used to push me around and call me lazy; I loved that wheelchair.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

If a parsley farmer loses a law suit, do they garnish his wages?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Entertainment Television Wordplay

Yawn: It’s always dullest just before the yawn.

Definitions Wordplay