Subject: Death (Page 3)

Memorial Service: Farewell party for someone who has already left.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator

We were making love and I took the bag off my head.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director

I will not go down to posterity talking bad grammar.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author

Are you happy?  I'm happy.

(1879 – 1959) American actress

Sheldon: At my age, do you know how I’m statistically most likely to die?
Leonard: At the hands of your roommate?
Sheldon: An accident.
Leonard: That’s how I’m going to make it look.

(1975 – ) American actor

Many people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic

Where there’s a will – there’s a relative!

(1961 – ) English comedian, actor, director, producer & writer

Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges.

(1941 – ) American singer & songwriter

Gentlemen, I bid you farewell.


It's very beautiful over there.

(1847 – 1931) American inventor, scientist & businessman

Lady, you shot me.

(1931 – 1964) American singer, songwriter & entrepreneur

Death takes no bribes.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor

You sons of bitches, give my love to Mother!

(1912 - 1932) American convicted murderer & career criminal

Longevity: Uncommon extension of the fear of death.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist

Do not hack me as you did my Lord Russell.

(1649 – 1685) English nobleman

When I die, I hope to go to heaven… whatever the hell that is.

(1905 – 1982) Russian-American novelist, playwright & philosopher

Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here.

(1503 – 1566) French apothecary & reputed seer who published his prophecies

Errol Flynn died on a 70-foot boat with a 17-year-old girl; Walter has always wanted to go that way, but he's going to settle for a 17-footer with a 70-year-old.

(1916– 2005) American wife of Walter Cronkite

One never knows the ending. One has to die to know exactly what happens after death… although Catholics have their hopes.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer

A few decades ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Hope, no Cash and no Jobs; please don’t let Kevin Bacon die!

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian

Gents, this is an educational project. You are about to witness the damaging effect electricity has on Wood.

(? – 1963) convicted murderer