Subject: Definitions (Page 42)

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Courtship: When a fellow and a girl are always trying to show how smart he is.

Definitions Relationships

Statesman: A politician away from home.

Definitions Politicians

Vasectomy: Never having to say you’re sorry.

Definitions

Jeans: Lower half of the international uniform of youth.

Appearance Clothing Definitions

Alcohol: A liquid good for preserving everything except secrets.

Alcohol Definitions Food/Drink

Quagmire: Any situation more easily entered into than exited from; e.g., a guerrilla war, a bad marriage or a conversation with an insurance salesman.

Definitions

Petting: The study of anatomy in braille.

Definitions Sex

Fore: A golf bawl.

Definitions Golf Sports

Eunuch: One who is cut off from temptation.

Body Definitions

Lecher: A stud with liver spots.

Definitions

Genetic Engineering: Tampering with chromosomes so that science might develop a new miracle cure or a rabbit that plays the banjo. –

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Science/Weather

Farm: A hunk of land on which, if you get up early enough mornings and work late enough nights, you’ll make a fortune – if you strike oil on it.

(1896 – 1988) American actor
Definitions TV/Movie Quotes

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Definitions

Auctioneer: The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

Definitions Occupations

Trick Photography: Focus pocus.

Definitions

Monarch: A king with a good publicity man.

Definitions

Communist: A fellow who will gladly divide his hunger and thirst with you if you’ll divide your beer and salami with him.

Definitions

Average Person: One who thinks someone else is the average person.

Definitions People

Skeptic: One who won’t take know for an answer.

Definitions People

Insurance: An ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Money

Sport: War without killing.

Definitions