Subject: Definitions (Page 63)

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Bikini: Baiting Suit.

Clothing Definitions

Diet: The penalty for exceeding the feed limit.

Definitions Food/Drink

Florists: Petal pushers.

Definitions

Love: Oceans of emotions surrounded by expanses of expenses.

Definitions Emotions Love

Traffic Light: A little green light that changes to red as your car approaches.

Autos Definitions Things

Honeymoon Sandwich: Just lettuce alone, with no dressing.

Definitions Marriage

Tolerance: That uncomfortable feeling that the other fellow might be right after all.

Beliefs Characteristics Definitions

Strip Teaser: One who makes a bare living.

Body Definitions Occupations

Earthquake: A topographical error.

Definitions

Work: An unpopular way to earn money.

Definitions Work

Avoidance: A dance for people who hate each other.

Definitions

Cavity: Empty space ready to be stuffed with dentist’s bills.

Definitions

Science: An orderly arrangement of what, at the moment, seems to be the facts.

Beliefs Definitions Facts Science/Weather

The best definition of an honest politician is one who… when he is bought, stays bought.

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Definitions Government Politicians

Beauty: The power with which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Appearance Definitions

Vaccination: An ouch of prevention.

Definitions Health

Nursery: Bawl room.

Definitions

Matrimony: A knot tied by a preacher and untied by a lawyer.

Definitions Marriage

Vice: A function to keep virtue within reasonable bounds.

Definitions

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece.

Definitions

Historian: An editor of yesterday’s news.

Definitions History Occupations Time Work