Subject: Family » Children (Page 14)

Margaret Addams: What.
Debbie Jellinsky: Oh, I didn’t say anything.
Margaret Addams: No, that’s the baby’s nickname, What … from the obstetrician.

(1941 – ) American actress
Children TV/Movie Quotes

Every book is a children's book if the kid can read.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Books Children Reading/Writing

An allowance is what you pay your children to live with you.

Children Definitions Family

Quiet: A state of household serenity which occurs before the birth of the first child and occurs again after the last child has left for college.

Children Definitions Family

I never met a kid I liked.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Children Family Relationships

Kids… I like kids, but I couldn’t eat a whole one.

Age Children Family Travel

Out of the mouths of babes come things parents never should have said.

Children Communication Family Speech

Having a kid is great… as long as his eyes are closed and he's not moving or talking.

(1966 – ) American actor, comedian, screenwriter & film producer
Children Family

Kids are great. You can teach them to hate what you hate and, with the Internet and all, they practically raise themselves.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Children TV/Movie Quotes

Learning to dislike children at an early age saves a lot of expense and aggravation later in life.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Age Children Emotions

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.

(1889 – 1945) actor, author & humorist
Animals Children Dogs Learning

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child; she must be found and stopped.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Children Exaggerations People Women

There is no reciprocity; men love women, women love children, children love hamsters.

Anna Haycraft (1932 – 2005) English writer & essayist
Children Emotions Love Men Women

Baby: Nine months interest on a small deposit.

Children Definitions Family

The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant – and let the air out of the tires.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Children Family Places

Kids say the darndest things.

(1912 – 2010) Canadian-born American radio & television personality & humorist
Children Family Speech

Parents – especially step-parents – are sometimes a bit of a disappointment to their children; they don’t fulfill the promise of their early years.

(1905 – 2000) English writer
Children Family Parents

You might be a redneck if… you removed the back seat from your car so all yer kids could fit in.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Autos Children People Rednecks Things

Let the kids pay it – they still owe us rent and gas money.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Children Government Money

Children in a family are like flowers in a bouquet: there’s always one determined to face in an opposite direction from the way the arranger desires.

writer
Children Family

Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Children Family Fathers