Subject: Government (Page 12)

The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator.

Arms Intelligence Military

Reality Has A Well-Known Liberal Bias

Politics

However harmless a thing is, if the law forbids it most people will think it wrong.

(1874 – 1965) English dramatist & novelist
Government Law

Tax Reform: Taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven’t been taxed before.

Definitions Government Taxes

Any ship can be a minesweeper… once.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws War

Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects.

(1897 – 1972) Canadian prime minister
Government Politics

Nobody can ever learn our military's secrets — unless, you know, they happen to have the Discovery Channel… then, it's pretty easy, just tune in for a few minutes.

(1974 – ) American stand-up comedian & actor
Entertainment Government Military Television

Lawyers, I suppose, were children once.

(1775 – 1834) English critic & essayist
Age Children Government Law Lawyers Young

Vote for the man who promises least; he’ll be the least disappointing.

(1870 – 1965) businessman & politician
Elections/Voting Government Politics

Exceptions prove the rule, and destroy the battle plan.

Military Murphy’s Laws

If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.

Government Murphy’s Laws Problems

We’re all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may not have made.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Misspokements Mistakes Problems

Bureaucrat: A Democrat who holds an office that a Republican wants.

Government People

If you want to get ahead in this world get a lawyer – not a book.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Lawyers Life

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won’t cross the street to vote in a national election.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
America Democracy Elections/Voting Government Places War World

A man running for office puts me in mind of a dog that’s lost – he smells everybody he meets, and wags himself all over.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Animals Dogs Politicians

Nothing can so alienate a voter from the political system as backing a winning candidate.

American comedian & actor
Government Politics

How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?

(1944 – ) English writer & broadcaster
Government

Diplomacy is the art of saying ‘Nice doggie’ until you can find a rock.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Characteristics Government

Forever poised between a cliche and an indiscretion.

(1894 – 1986) British prime minister
Government Occupations Work

No politician talks taxes during an election year.

Elections/Voting Government Murphy’s Laws Politicians Taxes