Subject: Government (Page 16)

These days, the only time politicians tell the truth is when they call each other a liar.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Characteristics Honesty Lies Politicians Truth

I was never ruined but twice; once when I lost a lawsuit and once when I won one.

(1694 – 1778) French author, humanist & satirist
Government Law

If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything.

Military

Statesman: A politician away from home.

Definitions Politicians

If the enemy is in range, so are you!

Military Murphy’s Laws

A libertarian is just a Republican who takes drugs.

(1951 – ) American anarchist writer
Drugs Government People Politics

Perhaps the Congress could honor the 50th anniversary of FDR's death by observing a few minutes of competence.

(1946 – 2004) American comedian
Government

The mistakes made by Congress wouldn't be so bad if the next Congress didn't keep trying to correct them.

(1923 – ) American quote & quip writer
Congress Government Mistakes Problems

There are many inside dopes in politics and government.

Fools Government Intelligence Language Murphy’s Laws Politics

When I entered politics, I took the only downward turn you could take from journalism.

(1943 – ) U.S. agriculture commissioner, columnist, activist & author
Politicians

When the president, during the campaign, said he was against nation building, I didn't realize he meant our nation.

(1951 – ) U.S. senator (Minnesota), political commentator, comedian & writer
Government President

The cardinal rule of politics: never get caught in bed with a live man or a dead woman.

(1931– 2012) American actor, producer & director
Government Politics Sex

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
America Government Intelligence Occupations Places Work

You do the policy, I'll do the politics.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Government Misspokements Politics

For those eight years Clinton was the president, it was like we had that really cool substitute teacher.

(1977 – ) American comedian
Education Government President

Democracy is being allowed to vote for the candidate you dislike least.

(1972 – ) Irish stand-up comedian, voice over artist & actor
Democracy Government People

Tax Reform: Taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven’t been taxed before.

Definitions Government Taxes

If we had less statesmanship we could get along with fewer battleships.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Arms Conflict Government Military Things War

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare.

(1927 – 2003) American politician
Government Intelligence

Much as he is opposed to lawbreaking, he is not bigoted about it.

(1990 – 1946) newspaperman & writer
Government Law

The worst part about politics is that you're always right and no one ever knows it

Government Politics