Subject: Government (Page 41)

Those who express random thoughts to legislative committees are often surprised and appalled to find themselves the instigators of law.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

There are many inside dopes in politics and government.

Fools Government Intelligence Language Murphy’s Laws Politics

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.

Military Murphy’s Laws

Master of the Rolls: Really, Mr Smith, do give this Court credit for some little intelligence.

Smith: That is the mistake I made in the Court below, My Lord.

(1872 – 1930) British statesman, politician & lawyer
Government Law

Admiral: A general at sea.

Definitions Military

With a black president, I can relax…I can dance in public… I can buy a whole watermelon now.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Characteristics Government President Situations

Whatever goes us, stays up.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

Incoming fire has the right of way.

Military Murphy’s Laws War

A man running for office puts me in mind of a dog that’s lost – he smells everybody he meets, and wags himself all over.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Animals Dogs Politicians

Mr. Speaker, I withdraw; half the cabinet are not asses.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Government

If we had more time for discussion we should probably have made a great many more mistakes.

(1879 – 1940) Russian Marxist revolutionary, theorist & Soviet politician
Government

No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session.

Congress Government Murphy’s Laws Politics

Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today.

Communication Reading/Writing Taxes

The weight of all of your equipment is proportional to the cube of the time you have been carrying it.

Military

Bing (Crosby) doesn't pay income tax; he just calls the government and says, 'How much do you boys need?'

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Government Money Taxes Wealth

Honest Politician: One who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Definitions Government Politicians

They couldn't hit an elephant at this distance!

(1813 – 1864) American teacher & Union Army general in the Civil War
Death Government Military

Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Democracy Government

Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
America Government Places Politics

Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it.

(1919 – 1990) educator & writer
Politics Success

Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.

(1713 – 1784) French philosopher, art critic & writer
Government