Subject: Government » Politicians (Page 4)

Politicians who complain about the media are like ships’ captains who complain about the sea.

(1912 – 1998) British politician
Communication Government Politicians

Elections are when people find out what politicians stand for, and politicians find out what people will fall for.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Elections/Voting Government People Politicians

When I entered politics, I took the only downward turn you could take from journalism.

(1943 – ) U.S. agriculture commissioner, columnist, activist & author
Politicians

Did you ever notice that when a politician does get an idea he usually gets it all wrong.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Government Ideas Intelligence Politicians

Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to vote for Colonel Sanders.

(1959 – ) U.S. Representative (South Carolina)
Elections/Voting Government Politicians

When a politician gets an idea, he usually gets it wrong.

Ideas Murphy’s Laws Politicians

A promising young man should go into politics so that he can go on promising for the rest of his life.

(1930 – ) American author and billiard player, teacher & commentator
Government Politicians

Compared to the Clintons, Reagan is living proof that a Republican with half a brain is better than a Democrat with two.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Insults Politicians

Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Government Politicians

Dilemma: A politician trying to save both his faces at once.

Definitions Politicians Problems

The Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Death Government Politicians

A politician will do anything to keep his job—even become a patriot.

(1863 – 1951) American newspaper magnate & politician
Government Politicians

The general rule is that a democratic politician had better not be right too soon.

(1889 – 1974) American intellectual, writer, reporter & political commentator
Government Politicians

A Republican stands up in Congress and says I’ve got a really bad idea!' and the Democrat stands up after him and says 'and I can make it shittier!”

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Government Politicians

According to reports, President Bush and John Kerry have combined $23 million left over from the 2004 presidential campaign, while Ralph Nader recently discovered some old gum in his hair.

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Elections/Voting Politicians TV/Movie Quotes

A man running for office puts me in mind of a dog that’s lost – he smells everybody he meets, and wags himself all over.

(1818 – 1885) humorist
Animals Dogs Politicians

A politician is a man who approaches every question with an open mouth.

(1770 – 1827) British statesman, politician & prime minister
Communication Government Politicians Speech

Bureaucrat: A politician who has tenure.

Definitions Government Politicians

All people are born alike – except Republicans and Democrats.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Government People Politicians

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Government Intelligence Memory Politicians

What is the difference between a Democrat and a Republican?… a Democrat blows; a Republican sucks.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Government Politicians