Subject: Miscellaneous (Page 74)

I've Never Gone to Bed with an Ugly Woman

Miscellaneous

One bad thing about Lassie, she was always warning you about something; let me be surprised for a change.

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Old as dirt

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Built like a brick shithouse

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Pretty is as pretty does.

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They say no one knows if we all see red the same way… except traffic cops.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
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I'm so hungry I could eat my elbows.

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Don't worry 'bout the mule son, just load the wagon.

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Will ya take on wood?

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Good Heavenly Days!

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Gridlock Christmas

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We’ve had to get a live-in nanny, ‘cos that dead one wasn’t working out.

(1968 – ) English comedian & actor
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Girlfriend Calling You Fat? You Probably Are. Ride Bike

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I wish to my never.

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You can’t measure a snake till ti’t stretched out dead.

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All that remains is for a few dots and commas to be crossed.

English football player
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With every new sunrise, there is a new chance; but with every sunset, you blew it.

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I hope that someday we will be able to put away our fears and prejudices and just laugh at people.

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I don’t pretend to have all the answers; I don’t pretend to even know what the questions are… hey, where am I?

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Nervous as a cow with a bucktooth calf.

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You can’t blame a worm for not wanting to go fishing.

Miscellaneous