Subject: Money (Page 27)

You can't get rich in politics unless you are a crook.


Government Money Politics Wealth

Cocaine is God's way of saying that you're making too much money.

(1951 – 2014) comedian & actor
God Money

When you pass the buck, don't ask for change.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Money Situations

Some people pay their bills when due, some when overdue, and some never do.

Money

Delayed Payment: A tourniquet applied at the pockets.

Definitions Money

When a person with experience meets a person with money, the person with experience will get the money and the person with the money will get some experience.

Money Murphy’s Laws

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return; it's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale.

(1917 – ) English physicist & science fiction author
Characteristics Honesty Money

She makes pancakes so thin they’ve got just one side to them.

Expressions Food/Drink Frugal Money

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Money

He’s so chincy, he can call his every dollar by its first name.

Frugal Miscellaneous Money

It is better to live rich than to die rich.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Death Life Money Poverty Wealth

When I was born I owed twelve dollars.

(1889 – 1961) Am. playwright, theater director & producer & humorist
Money Poverty Self

No gold-digging for me… I take diamonds!

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Money Situations

You will never find any more loose change than you have already lost.

Money Murphy’s Laws

The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.

Government Money Murphy’s Laws Taxes

Every cloud has its silver lining but it is sometimes a little difficult to get it to the mint.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Money Situations

The length of a marriage is inversely proportional to the amount spent on the wedding.

Marriage Money Murphy’s Laws Time

Authors want their names down in history; I want to keep the smoke coming out of the chimney.

(1918 – 2006) American writer
Money Success Work

I'm the kind of guy who will have nothing all my life and then they'll discover oil while they're digging my grave.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Death Life Money Wealth

I put on my favorite winter jacket for the first time the other day, and as soon as I put my hands in those pockets, I was immediately reminded that last year I didn't have any money, either.

(1970 – ) American comedian & television game show host
Money Poverty

Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents?

(1918 – 2007) American humor writer
Government Money Taxes