Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 78)

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Whenever one word or letter can change the entire meaning of a sentence, the probability of an error being made will be in direct proportion to the embarrassment it will cause.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Speech

Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.

(1913 – 1983) journalist & author
Money Murphy’s Laws Things

The time it takes to rectify a situation is inversely proportional to the time it took to do the damage.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

Where zoning is not needed, it will work perfectly; where it is desperately needed, it always breaks down.

Murphy’s Laws

When eating an elephant, take one bite at a time.

Eating Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

Expressways aren’t.

Autos Murphy’s Laws Things

When an error has been detected and corrected, it will be found to have been correct in the first place

Corollary: After the correction has been found in error, it will be impossible to fit the original quantity back into the equation.

Ideas Intelligence Mistakes Murphy’s Laws

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you will have to catch up.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.

Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Problems

One child is not enough, but two children are far too many.

Children Family Murphy’s Laws

Things always go from bad to worse.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

Those who express random thoughts to legislative committees are often surprised and appalled to find themselves the instigators of law.

Government Law Murphy’s Laws

Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

An object will fall so as to do the most damage.

Murphy’s Laws

The only new show worth watching will be cancelled.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

Early to bed and early to rise makes a man tired in mid afternoon.

Activities Murphy’s Laws Sleep

Pills to be taken in twos always come out of the bottle in threes.

Health Murphy’s Laws

Each pronoun agrees with their antecedent.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

The gifts you buy your wife are never as appropriate as the gifts your neighbor buys his wife.

Husbands Murphy’s Laws Shopping Wives

Whatever you did, that's what you planned.

Murphy’s Laws

No matter what the experiment’s result, there will always be someone eager to: (a) misinterpret it, (b) fake it, or (c) believe it supports his own pet theory.

Murphy’s Laws