Subject: Murphy’s Laws (Page 77)

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A pipe gives a wise man time to think and a fool something to stick in his mouth.

Fools Murphy’s Laws Wisdom

When a person with experience meets a person with money, the person with experience will get the money and the person with the money will get some experience.

Money Murphy’s Laws

1. If you want something badly, that's how you get it. 2. Many "get-rich-quick" schemes make millionaires – out of multi-millionaries.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Tact is the art of telling someone to lose thirty pounds without ever using the word “fat.”

Characteristics Fat Murphy’s Laws

Tracers work BOTH ways.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

The length of a meeting rises with the square of the number of people present.

Murphy’s Laws

A clever remark is one you don’t make at the appropriate moment, but compose immediately after.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

There is a tendency for the person in the most powerful position in an organization to spend all his time serving on committees and signing letters.

Murphy’s Laws Time

Everything costs more and takes longer.

Money Murphy’s Laws Time

At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Murphy’s Laws People

Once the erosion of power begins, it has a momentum all its own.

Murphy’s Laws Situations

The label "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" means the price went up.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

There must be one day above all others in each life that is the happiest

Corollary: What if you’ve already had it?

Emotions Happiness Murphy’s Laws Time

The stomach expands to accommodate the amount of junk food available.

Food/Drink Murphy’s Laws

There are 32 points to the compass, meaning that there are 32 directions in which a spoon can squirt grapefruit; yet, the juice almost invariably flies straight into the human eye.

Murphy’s Laws

About one-fifth of the people are against everything all the time.

Government Murphy’s Laws

The first bug to hit a clean windshield lands directly in front of your eyes.

Autos Driving Murphy’s Laws Things

A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years.

Computers Mistakes Murphy’s Laws Things Time

If rats are experimented upon, they will develop cancer.

Murphy’s Laws

When you are right, be logical; when you are wrong, be-fuddle.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

If you were forced to read the book in high school, you’ll probably hate the movie too.

Books Education Film Murphy’s Laws School