Subject: People (Page 102)

My makeup team is nominated for “Best Special Effects.”

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Appearance Self

You might be a redneck if… you removed the back seat from your car so all yer kids could fit in.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Autos Children People Rednecks Things

The only thing creepier than seeing a guy in a Speedo is seeing a guy in a Speedo staring back at you.

American comedian & television host
People Situations Things

I was walking in the park and this guy waved at me; then he said, ‘I’m sorry, I thought you were someone else.’ I said, ‘I am.

(1973 – ) American comedian
People Self Situations

You might be a redneck if… the biggest city you have ever been to is Wal-Mart.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Places Rednecks

Scotsman: A man who, before sending his pajamas to the laundry, stuffs a sock in each pocket.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Frugal Money People

I know what the public want because I am one of them.

(1906 – 1998) Russian-born English film producer & media mogul
Entertainment Film People Television

I finally know what distinguishes man from the other beasts: financial worries.

(1864 – 1910) French author
Animals Money People

You can tell he used to be a rancher; he squeezes Republicans like he's milking a cow.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
People

Well, I screwed it up real good, didn't I?

(1913 – 1994) 37th U.S. president
Mistakes People Problems Self

I learned whether you are gay, bisexual, it doesn’t matter, you know… because, at the end of the day, they’re both gross.

(1970 – ) American comedian, writer & actress
People Sex

Ninety-nine per cent of the people in the world are fools and the rest of us are in great danger of contagion.

(1897 – 1975) American author & playwright
Fools Intelligence People

Perhaps men should think twice before making widowhood our only path to power.

(1934 – ) American feminist, journalist, & social & political activist
Death Men People Women

I want to donate a large amount of money to a rape clinic and I won't take no for an answer.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
People

He’s an animal lover… people he don’t like so much.

(1937 – ) British playwright & screenwriter
People

Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Characteristics Men People War

You might be a redneck if… you have a bumper sticker that says, "MY MOTHER'S AN HONOR STUDENT AT SOUTH LITTLE ROCK JR. HIGH."

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Education Mothers People Rednecks School

God is good to the Irish, but no one else is, not even the Irish.

(1858 – 1932) American physicist, physician & humorist
People Places

We cherish our friends not for their ability to amuse us, but for ours to amuse them.

(1903 – 1966) English writer
Emotions Friends Love People

There are two times in a woman’s life when clothes are important: when she is young and when she is old.

writer
Appearance Clothing People Women

Nixon impeached himself; he gave us Gerald Ford as his revenge.

(1920 – 1998) lawyer, congresswoman, & women's movement activist
Government People