Subject: People (Page 50)

Many years ago I remember a famous actress explaining to me with perfect seriousness that before making an entrance she always stood aside to allow God to go on first; I can also remember that on that particular occasion He gave a singularly uninspired performance.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Acting People Reviews/Criticism

My name is Fin, which means it's very hard for me to end emails without sounding pretentious.

comedian
People Self

Before I met her, I drank and swore without reason… now I have a reason.

(1924 – 1992) English comedian & actor
Alcohol Food/Drink People Situations

I think that women just have a primeval instinct to make soup, which they will try to foist on anybody who looks like a likely candidate.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Cooking Food/Drink People Women

One time my whole family played hide and seek; they found my mother in Pittsburgh!

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Family Mothers People Self

You know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Entertainment People

I’m English, but I want to let you know that even though I’m English, I’m not here to solve a murder mystery.

comedian
England People Places

Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary!

People

I suffer fools gladly because I am one of them.

(1921 – 2001) Welsh comedian & singer
Fools Intelligence People Self

I never saw my mother up close.

(1945 – ) American humorist (co-founder of National Lampoon)
Family Mothers People Self

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.

(1882 – 1941) English novelist, essayist, publisher & feminist
Communication History People Reading/Writing Time Women

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Girls Places

In any dealings with a collective body of people, the people will always be more tacky than originally expected.

Murphy’s Laws People

So, have you noticed there aren't a lot of Chinese guys named Rusty?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
People

Don't give a woman advice; one should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Clothing People Women

All men are afraid of eyelash curlers; I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Arms Fear Men People Things

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men People

No one ever went broke in Hollywood underestimating the intelligence of the public.

(1883 – 1963) American writer & hostess
Hollywood Intelligence People Places

Dinah [Shore] formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles.

(1919 – 2006) American comedian & actor
Age Food/Drink Old People

He had the kind of handshake that ought never to be used except as a tourniquet.

(1922 – ) English comedy writer & television presenter
Characteristics People

You might be a redneck if… you've ever cut your grass and found a car.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities Autos People Rednecks