Subject: Places (Page 4)

A Canadian is someone who knows how to make love in a canoe.

(1920 – 2004) Canadian author, television personality & journalist
People Places Sex Things

China has a population of a billion people; that means even if you’re a one-in-a-million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you

(1952 – ) American writer & comedian
Characteristics People Places

Our meetings are held to discuss many problems which would never arise if we held fewer meetings.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Places Problems

Kilt: A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans in Scotland.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
America Clothing Definitions Places

The only place in the world where a man can get stabbed in the back while climbing a ladder.

(1897-1962) American writer
Hollywood Insults Places

I look upon Switzerland as an inferior sort of Scotland.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Places

Take a cruise down to the Virgin’s Island.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops Places

We Americans live in a nation where the medical-care system is second to none in the world, unless you count maybe 25 or 30 little scuzzball countries like Scotland that we could vaporize in seconds if we felt like it.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
America Health Places

Hell is paved with good samaritans.

Places

English? Who needs that? I’m never going to England.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Communication England Language Places

The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. I mean in this century's history. But we all lived in this century. Well, I didn't live in this century.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
America History Misspokements Places

If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

(1927 – 2004) American comedian & actor
Places

I often confuse Americans and Canadians… by using long words.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
America Canada People Places

Hoboken – lovely town, often called 'the Tennessee of New Jersey.'

(1954 – ) American comedian, writer & musician
Places

Don't let the whole world come here and see our stuff; it just pisses them off.

television executive & comedian
America Anger Emotions Places World

In a country as big as the United States, you can find fifty examples of anything.

America Murphy’s Laws Places

Home is the girl's prison and the woman's workhouse.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Places

If banks are so good with numbers, why are there always eight windows and three tellers?

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Places

The one great principle of the English law is, to make business for itself.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
England Government Law Places

Night Club: A place where they take the rest out of restaurant and put the din in dinner.

Definitions Places

We might as well give them ours, we aren’t using it.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
America Places