Subject: Problems (Page 2)

Alimony is a system by which, when two people make a mistake, one of them continues to pay for it.

(1893 – 1957) American actress & celebrity
Marriage Mistakes Money

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Fools Intelligence Mistakes People Problems

I found out that it's not good to talk about my troubles; eighty percent of the people don't care and the other twenty percent are glad you're having trouble.

Los Angeles Dodgers’ manager
Baseball People Problems Sports

Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.

Problems

When you're up to your nose, keep your mouth shut.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

When anything is used to its full potential, it will break.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

There is a solution to every problem; the only difficulty is finding it.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If you are going to do something wrong, at least enjoy it.

(1908 – 1997) German-born teacher, academic & humorist
Mistakes Problems

To beat the bureaucracy, make your problem their problem.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Anytime you wish to demonstrate something, the number of faults is proportional to the number of viewers.

Murphy’s Laws People Problems

In larger things we are convivial – What causes trouble is the trivial.

(1906 – 1989) American poet & author
Life Problems

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Age Emotions Failure Friends

When one is trying to be elegant and sophisticated, one won't.

,
Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

If it jams, force it; if it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

Accidents Failure Murphy’s Laws

When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

Never moon a werewolf.

(1958 – ) screenwriter, film director & actor
Problems Situations

Everything will go wrong at one time.

Corollary: That time is always when you least expect it.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Time

When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger have handled this?"

Murphy’s Laws Problems

Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.

Murphy’s Laws Problems Situations

You should have seen it when I got it.

Murphy’s Laws Problems

If I could kick the person in the tail that causes me the most problems I could not sit down for a week.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
People Problems Self