Subject: Sex (Page 8)

By the time my friend was eighteen she had sown enough wild oats to make a grain deal with Russia.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
People Sex

I've always have this fantasy to make love to two women – you know, in the same year.

television writer, actor
Sex

I'm at the age where I want two girls; in case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Sex

I wouldn’t kidnap a man for sex, but I’m not saying I couldn’t use someone to oil the mower.

(1953 – 2016) British comedian, actress, singer & screenwriter
Men People Sex Situations

In every group of girlfriends, there’s that one who is the sluttiest; if you don’t have that friend, you’re that friend.

(1981 – ) American Comedian
Girlfriends People Sex

When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned… do not have sex with the authorities.

(1954 – ) cartoonist, screenwriter, producer & creator of The Simpsons
Sex

Sex isn't necessary; you don't die without it – but you can die having it.

(1880 – 1946) comedian, actor, juggler & writer
Sex

Kinky is using a feather; perverted is using the whole chicken.

Sex

And most men seem to think ‘mutual orgasm’ is an insurance company.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Men People Sex

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee; unfortunately, she was just coming home.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Appearance Clothing Sex Wives

I need to make as much as my wife so I don’t have to try so hard in bed.

(1980 – ) American actor, comedian & musician
Money Sex TV/Movie Quotes

I grew up… in a house filled with love… my cousin lived there and she put out.

(1950 – ) Canadian comedian, actor, writer, singer & producer
Relationships Sex

I remember the first time I had sex – I kept the receipt.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Sex

Last night I asked my husband, ‘What’s your favorite sexual position?’ and he said, ‘Next door.’

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Sex

Although humans tend to view sex as mainly a fun recreational activity sometimes resulting in death, in nature it is a far more serious matter.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
People Sex

Incest: in many parts of the Bible Belt, the most popular form of dating.

American author
Dating Relationships Sex

Adultery is the application of democracy to love.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Communication Love Marriage Sex

I’m not a good lover, but at least I’m fast.

(1958 – ) standup comedian, actor, game show host & photographer
Sex

One day as I came home early from work… I saw a guy jogging naked. I said to the guy, “Hey buddy, why are you doing that?” He said, “Because you came home early.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Marriage Sex Situations Wives

The vertical expression of a horizontal desire legalized by music.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Dance Entertainment Music Sex

Having to read a footnote resembles having to go downstairs to answer the door while in the midst of making love.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Books Communication Reading/Writing Sex