Subject: Sports (Page 54)

A business executive is someone who talks golf in the office and business on the golf course.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Golf Sports

All of his saves have come during relief appearances.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

When Neil Armstong first set foot on the moon, he and all the space scientists were puzzled by an unidentifiable white object; I knew immediately what it was… that was a home run ball hit off me in 1933 by Jimmie Foxx.

(1908 – 1989) American baseball player
Activities Baseball Sports

You have to have a catcher because if you don’t you’re likely to have a lot of passed balls.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Baseball Misspokements Sports

My first priority is to finish above rather than beneath the ground.

American auto racer
Auto racing Sports

Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical.

(1925 – 2015) baseball player, coach & manager
Baseball Characteristics Yogi-isms

Hockey players wear numbers because you can’t always identify the body with dental records.

Hockey Sports

What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?

English football player, manager & sports commentator
Misspokements Sports

Kids are great. That's one of the best things about our business, all the kids you get to meet. It's a shame they have to grow up to be regular people and come to the games and call you names.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Children Sports

You need two yards, I'll get you three. You need 10 yards, I'll get you three.

American football player
Football Sports

Nigel Mansell is the only man who goes to Nick Faldo for charisma lessons.

English actor & television personality
Auto racing Insults Sports

Therapy can be a good thing; it can be therapeutic.

professional baseball player
Misspokements Sports

I don't think he'd even be happy with ice cream right now.

(1958 – ) Irish professional golfer & commentator
Golf Sports

Fishing is a delusion entirely surrounded by liars in old clothes.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Activities Beliefs Characteristics Clothing Lies Sports

The Champagne they have stored is getting more valuable every year.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Alcohol Baseball Food/Drink Sports

We estimate, and this isn’t an estimation, that Greta Waitz is 80 seconds behind.

(1926 – ) English sports commentator
Colemanballs Misspokements Sports

I can play anywhere; First, Third, Left field… anywhere but Philadelphia.

(1942 – ) American baseball player
Baseball Places Sports

There is nothing wrong with the car except that it is on fire.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Problems Sports

It would be like the elephants standing up on two feet. It would be like the man being shot out of the cannon. It would be like a woman with a beard down to the floor. It would be the greatest show on earth.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

You can put that in one word… world class darts!

British sports commentator
Sports

We got to practice a little bit. I want these guys to be bouncing around like a pogo stick on Viagra.

football coach
Football Misspokements Sports