Subject: Sports (Page 84)

Mike Tyson's not all that bad. If you dig deep … dig real deep, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, deep, deep, go all the way to China … I'm sure, you'll find there's a nice guy in there.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Sports

The trouble with me is that every match I play against five opponents: umpire, crowd, ball boys, court, and myself.

Croatian professional tennis player
Sports

I just told him to drop the &%^# puck. I didn’t suggest his mother had swum after troop ships or anything.


Sports

All of the Mets' road wins against Los Angeles this year have been at Dodger Stadium.

(1922 – 2014) American baseball player & announcer
Baseball Misspokements Sports

We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite.

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

Until you play it, St. Andrews looks like the sort of real estate you couldn't give away.

(1912 – 2002) professional golfer
Golf Sports

We hate each other. People assume that we respect each other because we’re black. We don’t.

Canadian hockey player & commentator
Hockey Sports

Ed, you're the second best umpire in the league… the other twenty-three are tied for first.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports

We're so bad right now that for us back-to-back home runs means one today and another one tomorrow.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

And there’s the man in the green flag!

(1923 – ) English motorsport commentator
Auto racing Misspokements Sports

I guess it's why you never say never. The only thing you can never do is ski through a revolving door.

hockey coach
Hockey Sports

Willie Mays' glove is where triples go to die.

(1919 – 1998) American sportswriter
Baseball Sports

Don't worry, the fans don't start booing until July.

(1930 – 2013) American baseball manager
Baseball Sports

Playing golf is like going to a strip joint… after 18 holes you’re tired and most of your balls are missing.

(1953 – ) comedian & actor
Golf Sports

If everyone were like him (Mitch Williams) I wouldn't play. I'd find a safer way to make a living.

baseball player
Baseball

In a perfect world, a fair world, Bob Hayes should be forced to carry a small calf on his shoulder when he runs the dashes…Mark Spitz, in all fairness, would swim with a sea anchor…[and] Ella Fitzgerald must sing every note with a mouth full of Tootsie Rolls.

(1919 – ) American sportswriter
Entertainment Life Places Sports World

Statistics are to baseball what a flaky crust is to Mom’s apple pie.

(1926 – 1991) American television journalist
Baseball Science/Weather Sports

Ingemar Johansson is a leviathan with a strangler's hands and a smile like the beam of a lighthouse.

Boxing Sports

I miss the putt. I miss the putt. I miss the putt. I make the putt.

Spanish professional golfer
Golf Sports

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.

American basketball coach
Basketball Football Sports

I can do my sport no greater service.

(1950 – ) American boxer & actor
Boxing Sports