Subject: Things (Page 41)

Vacuum Cleaner: A sonic broom.

Definitions Things

I Xeroxed a mirror and now I have an extra Xerox machine.


Things

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Situations Things

1. An object in motion will be heading in the wrong direction.
2. An object at rest will be in the wrong place.

Murphy’s Laws Science/Weather Things

I've been on a calendar, but never on time.

(1926 – 1962) actress, sex symbol
Things Time

You might be a redneck if… you have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks Things

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Places Science/Weather Things

Don't accept rides from strange men, and remember that all men are strange.

(1941 – ) actor, writer, poet & feminist
Autos Men People