Subject: TV/Movie Quotes (Page 35)

Dick Cheney presented Donald Rumsfeld with a Defender of the Constitution Award… and, yes, the irony was lost on both of them.

(1973 – ) American comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes

Jack: We are lovers.

Liz: That word bums me out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza”.

(1970 – ) American actress, comedian, writer & producer
TV/Movie Quotes

Do you think that suppository is gonna be safe from me there, Edith?

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Health Misspokements TV/Movie Quotes

Girl Scout: I'll tell you what – I'll buy a cup [of lemonade] if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies. Do we have a deal?

Wednesday: Are they made from real Girl Scouts?

(1980 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

She reminds me of Paul Revere's ride – a little light in the belfry.

cartoon character (Mel Blanc)
Insults Intelligence TV/Movie Quotes

I would gladly go but I’ve got my compulsive spending seminar and I’m hoping to unload the rest of these raffle tickets.

(1959 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Jim: Pssssttt… what does the yellow light mean?
Bobby Wheeler: Slow down.
Jim: What… does… the… yellow… light… mean?

(1938 – ) American actor
TV/Movie Quotes

I wanted to get a writ of habeas corpus, but I should have gotten a-rid of you instead.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
TV/Movie Quotes

Penny: Aw honey, the buses don’t go where you live do they?

(1985 – ) American actress
TV/Movie Quotes

I spent three of the happiest years of my life in the fifth grade.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Education School TV/Movie Quotes

Woody, next time you order beer, be more specific than “lots.”

(1947) is an American actor, author & producer
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

Monica Banta: You must be Louie.
Louie De Palma: How did you know my name?
Monica: I only had three people described to me. One was smart, one was good-looking, and one was you.

(1950 – ) American actress & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Science is an intellectual dead end, you know? It’s a lot of little guys in tweed suits cutting up frogs on foundation grants.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Science/Weather TV/Movie Quotes

Can I draw you a beer, Norm?

No, I know what they look like; just pour me one.

George Wendt (1948 – ) American actor
Beer TV/Movie Quotes

I saw a twinkle in her eye I have not seen since the neighbor children discovered our new electric fence.

(1959 – ) American actor
Emotions TV/Movie Quotes

Volcanoes erupting hot guava.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Malaprops TV/Movie Quotes

What’s the matter? You’re pacing like an expectant father with the clap.

(1950 – ) American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

Frasier: And where the hell do you think you’re going?

Martin: To sit in the tub with a toaster and wait for the power to come back on.

(1940 – 2018) English-American actor & comedian
TV/Movie Quotes

I used to be Snow White… but I drifted.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
TV/Movie Quotes

Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here… this is the War Room!

(1925 – 1980) British comedian & actor
TV/Movie Quotes

Note to self: Stop. Doing. Anything.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Self TV/Movie Quotes