Author: Anonymous Page 62

“I feel a draft,” Tom said coolly.

Tom Swifties

… on hollowed ground

Malaprops

“The lion has its head caught in the skylight,” said Tom uproariously.

Tom Swifties

Tears: A good-bye product.

Definitions

Diet: What helps a person gain weight more slowly.

Definitions Food/Drink

“This wind is awful,” blustered Tom.

Tom Swifties

”..,” said Tom blankly.

Tom Swifties

Every silver lining has a cloud around it.

Mixed metaphors

Gluttony: A sign something is eating us.

Definitions Eating Food/Drink

“Do you know the location?” asked Tom warily.

Tom Swifties

Misnomer: The right name for the wrong word.

Communication Definitions Language

Graffiti: Urban scrawl.

Communication Definitions Reading/Writing

Kids… I like kids, but I couldn’t eat a whole one.

Age Children Family Travel

Demagogue: A man who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

Definitions

Income Tax: The entry fee for the rat race.

Definitions Government Taxes

Educated Man: One who has finally discovered that there are some questions to which nobody has the answers.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

“England is okay, except there seems to be at least one blood-sucking insect in every outhouse”, said Tom aloofly.

Tom Swifties

No two people in a car can agree on which window should be open… and how much.

Autos Things

“Oops, I’ve ripped my pants!” was Tom’s unseemly comment.

Tom Swifties

Hook: Irritating but highly reliable device used to quickly locate the position of one’s thumb at the bottom of a tackle box.

Activities Definitions

He was grinnin' like a possum eatin' bumble bees.

Miscellaneous