Keyword: Bad

If you go to any book store and look at any book on marriage, you'll see at least one photo of me about to put an ice tray with only one ice cube left in it back into the refrigerator.

(1955 – ) American actor, stand-up comedian & impressionist
Characteristics Husbands Marriage

It's [a movie script] about a girl who lost her reputation and never missed it.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Characteristics

I am the common denominator to all my bad relationships.

(1966 – 2011) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Relationships Self

Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Characteristics Success

As soon as you mention something, if it's good, it goes away; if it's bad, it happens.

Characteristics Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

A wide screen just makes a bad film twice as bad.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Characteristics Entertainment Film

I've been accused of vulgarity, and I say that's bullshit!

(1926 – ) film director, screenwriter, composer, comedian, actor & producer
Characteristics Communication Language

It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people: the good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Characteristics Situations Sleep

There's so much good in the worst of us, and so many of the worst of us get the best of us, that the rest of us aren't even worth talking about.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Characteristics People

You’ve got to take the bitter with the sour.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Characteristics Misspokements Speech

The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act, even when it has worked and he has not been caught.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Characteristics

Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.

(1922 – 2007) American novelist
Characteristics People

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

(1917 – 2012) comedian & actress
Cooking Eating Food/Drink

Living in a vacuum sucks.

writer, humorist, columnist & speaker
Characteristics Life

The function of vice is to keep virtue within reasonable bounds.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Characteristics

Logic is a system whereby one may go wrong with confidence.

(1876 – 1958) inventor
Characteristics Problems

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Girls Places

When we got into office, the thing that surprised me most was to find that things were just as bad as we'd been saying they were.

(1917 – 1963) 35th U.S. president
Characteristics Communication Problems

Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Elections/Voting Government Politicians

When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do – well, that's Memoirs.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Characteristics Past Reading/Writing Self

I used to be a narrator for bad mimes.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics Entertainment