Subject: Life

Have fun; and go home when you’re tired.

(1887 – 1995) American theater produce, director & playwright, screenwriter & film director
Life

Never do anything you wouldn’t get caught dead doing.

Life Murphy’s Laws

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older… little things, like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman—stuff you pay good money for in later life.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Age Life Sex

Life is one long process of getting tired.

Life Murphy’s Laws

Reality continues to ruin my life.

(1955 – ) cartoonist (Calvin and Hobbes)
Failure Life Problems

I'm the kind of guy who will have nothing all my life and then they'll discover oil while they're digging my grave.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Death Life Money Wealth

Life is a tale told by an idiot – full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

(1564 – 1616) English dramatist & poet
Life

We must all hang together, or most assuredly we shall all hang separately.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Death Life

It’s not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is the same damn thing over and over.

(1892 – 1950) poet
Life Problems

Make Life Your Bitch

Book Titles Life

This isn’t life in the fast lane, it’s life in the oncoming traffic.

(1948 – ) English novelist
Life

It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Life Marriage

You can’t do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Life

Life: A continuous series of disasters which result in one’s death.

Death Definitions Life

Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Life Problems

I think I am, therefore I am… I think.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Intelligence Life

Nietzsche says that we will live the same life, over and over again… Great, I’ll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Life Situations TV/Movie Quotes

We all learn by experience, but some of us have to go to summer school.

(1910 – 1993) editor & novelist
Education Learning Life School

Aren’t I lucky, to have survived so much bad luck.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Life Problems

You will never have more energy or enthusiasm, hair, or brain cells than you have today.

(1937 – 2014) American co-host of radio show “Car Talk”
Life

Spiritual is the word people use when they mean they want to be covered when they die but they’re not getting up early on a Sunday.

(1957 – 2007) American stand-up comedian & actor
Beliefs Death Life