Subject: Activities » Shopping (Page 2)

It’s easy to tell when you’ve got a bargain – it doesn’t fit.

Activities Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Age Old Shopping

Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at bowling alleys.

American comedian
Appearance Clothing Shopping

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Shopping Things

I liked Amsterdam… I spent $2,000 window shopping.

(1957 – ) American comedian
Places Sex Shopping

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Emotions Happiness Money People Shopping

People will buy anything that's one to a customer.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Activities Beliefs Religion Shopping

Thank God we’re living in a country where the sky’s the limit, the stores are open late and you can shop in bed thanks to television.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Activities Shopping

Bargain Hunter: One who is often led astray by false profits.

Activities Definitions Shopping

The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with ONLY a loaf of bread are three billion to one.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Activities Murphy’s Laws Shopping

A necessary item goes on sale only after you have purchased it at the regular price.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

Consumer: One who delights advertisers by acquiring unnecessary products.

Definitions Shopping

My first rule of consumerism is never to buy anything you can’t make your children carry.

American author
Activities Shopping

I went to a record store, they said they specialized in hard-to-find records… nothing was alphabetized!

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Shopping Situations

I went to a general store, but they wouldn’t let me buy anything specific.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Shopping Things

Never try to guess your wife's size. Just buy her anything marked ‘petite’ and hold on to the receipt.

Appearance Body Clothing Murphy’s Laws Shopping

You might be a redneck if… you've ever bought lingerie at a yard sale.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Clothing People Rednecks Shopping

She took my son to Costco, bought 14 pounds of Oreos – and saved us money somehow.

American stand-up comedian
Marriage Money Shopping Wives

Our culture teaches us to buy things we don't need, with money we don't have, to impress people we don't like.

(1946 – 2007) American entrepreneur
Activities Shopping

If you go to Bed Bath & Beyond without a coupon, people will wonder if you’re OK.

(1964 – 2014) American actor, Broadway performer & stand-up comedian
Activities Shopping