Subject: Activities » Shopping (Page 2)

If women dressed for men, the stores wouldn't sell much – just an occasional sun visor.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Appearance Clothing Men People Shopping Women

If you need n items of anything, you will have n – 1 in stock.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

I love Mexico because it’s a giant dollar store.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Places Shopping

How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Shopping Situations

If you don't write to complain, you'll never receive your order. If you do write, you'll receive the merchandise before your angry letter reaches its destination.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing Shopping

The slowest checker is always at the quick-check-out lane.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Money People Shopping Women

How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Shopping Situations

There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Husbands Marriage Shopping Wives

A necessary item goes on sale only after you have purchased it at the regular price.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping Things

You might be a redneck if… you've ever bought lingerie at a yard sale.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Appearance Clothing People Rednecks Shopping

Bargain: A transaction in which each party thinks he has cheated the other.

Definitions Shopping

Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at bowling alleys.

American comedian
Appearance Clothing Shopping

People will buy anything that's one to a customer.

Murphy’s Laws Shopping

When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping; men invade another country.

(1952 – ) comedian
Eating Men People Shopping War Women

That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Men People Shopping Women

He hasn’t an enemy in the world – but all his friends hate him.

(1892 – 1964) singer, dancer, comedian, actor & songwriter
Friends Insults People Shopping

Grocery list: What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Activities Definitions Shopping

Three o’clock in the morning, you can get truck tires, falafel and a bag of heroin – in the same store.

(1968 – ) American stand-up comedian, radio personality, author & actor
New York City Places Shopping

Men can say things in stores women can't believe like, "but I already have a pair of black pants.”

(1952 – ) comedian
Men People Shopping Speech Women

Some women hold up dresses that are so ugly and they always say the same thing: ‘This looks much better on.’… On what?… On fire?

(1954 – ) American actress & comedian
Activities Clothing Shopping Situations Women