Subject: Characteristics (Page 35)

Refinement: The ability to yawn without opening your mouth.

Characteristics Definitions

They say the definition of ambivalence is watching your mother-in-law drive over a cliff in your new Cadillac.

(1947 – ) American playwright, screenwriter & film director
Characteristics

… like to think that [Graham] Chapman was there with them all that day— “or rather, he will be in about 25 minutes.”

(1943 – ) English comedian, writer, television host & actor
Characteristics

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics Insults

I’m not a very competitive person… I’m always the first to say it.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Characteristics

Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Characteristics Hollywood Places Time

I feel very humble; but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Characteristics

Patience: A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

I'm the Descartes of anxiety; I panic, therefore I am.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Characteristics

My boyfriend's kids are half-Swedish, half-Norwegian: "They're see-through."

American stand-up comedian, television writer & actor
Characteristics People Places

Never accept a drink from a urologist.

(1927 – 1996) columnist & humorist
Alcohol Characteristics Doctors Health

The more things a man is ashamed of, the more respectable he is.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Characteristics People

A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Characteristics

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.

Characteristics

As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows, cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind.

(1917 – 1998) author, critic, animal rights activist
Animals Cats Characteristics People

Etiquette means behaving yourself a little better than is absolutely essential.

(1884 – 1949) American humorist & literary critic
Characteristics

Patience is a virgin.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Characteristics Malaprops

A diplomat is a man who thinks twice before he says nothing.

(1822 – 1891) U.S. senator (South Carolina)
Characteristics Government

I’d rather have an inch of a dog than miles of pedigree.

Animals Characteristics People

There is no substitute for good manners… except, perhaps, fast reflexes.

Characteristics Murphy’s Laws

When it comes to giving—some people stop at nothing.

Characteristics Money People