Subject: Communication (Page 10)

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Happiness Language People Sex

If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?

(1939 – ) comedian, actress, writer & producer
Communication Emotions Love Speech

There are three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and statistics.

(1804 – 1881) British prime minister, politician & author
Characteristics Communication Honesty Lies

My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine… (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Books Communication Self

I have often repented speaking, but never of holding my tongue.

(396 – 314 BC) Greek philosopher & mathematician
Communication Speech

I honestly believe there is absolutely nothing like going to bed with a good book… or a friend who’s read one.

(1906 – 1972) pianist, composer, author, comedian & actor
Age Books Friends People Sex Sleep

Americans don't really understand what's going on in Bosnia; to them it's the unspellables killing the unpronouncables.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Communication Language Places

Opera in English is, in the main, just about as sensible as baseball in Italian.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Baseball Language Music

Where would I be without my sense of direction.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Language People Self

My grandfather invented the cold air balloon… but it never really took off.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Miscellaneous Wordplay

Just between you and I, case is important.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

I think it would be really confusing if you’re performing an abortion and somebody runs in and says, “Abort! Abort!”

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Communication Language Situations

Violinist: A high-strung musician.

Definitions Entertainment Music Wordplay

You might be a redneck if… your child’s first words are “Attention Kmart shoppers!

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Children Family People Rednecks Speech

Judge: A man in a trying position.

Definitions Wordplay

Geologist: Fault finder.

Definitions Wordplay

Check to see if you any words out.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

I have the brain of a German Shepard and the body of 16-year-old boy… they're both in my car and I want you to see them.

(1956 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & television ho
Miscellaneous Wordplay

In a closed mouth, flies do not enter.

Communication Proverbs Speech

If you miss one issue of any magazine, it will be the issue that contains the article, story or installment you were most anxious to read.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

A kiss that speaks volumes is seldom a first edition.

(1892 – 1972) American comedian, dancer & composer
Emotions Sex Wordplay