Subject: Communication (Page 8)

Gossip: Anything that goes in one ear and over the back fence.

Communication Definitions Speech

I have only ever read one book in my life, and that is White Fang; it’s so frightfully good I’ve never bothered to read another.

(1904 – 1973) English novelist & biographer
Books Communication

Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money.

(1864 – 1910) French author
Communication Money Reading/Writing

A dirty book is rarely dusty.

Books Communication Reading/Writing Sex

When a person says that, in the interest of saving time, he will summarize his prepared statement, he will talk only three times as long as if he had read the statement in the first place.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech Time

If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.

(1925 – 2007) humorist & columnist
Communication Government

A rumor without a leg to stand on will get around some other way.

Communication

The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Communication Reading/Writing

A conference call is the best way for a dozen people to say “bye” 300 times.

American comedian
Communication

Polite conversation is rarely either.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Communication Conversation Speech

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.

(427 BC – 347 BC) Greek author & philosopher
Communication Fools Intelligence Speech Wisdom

My handwriting looks as if a swarm of ants, escaping from an ink bottle, had walked over a sheet of paper without wiping their legs.

(1771 – 1845) English writer & Anglican clergyman
Communication People Reading/Writing Self

I have an idea that the phrase ‘weaker sex’ was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Language Men People Women

My wife said: ‘I want an explanation and I want the truth.’ I said: ‘Make up your mind.’

(1906 – 1998) English-born American comedian
Communication Honesty Marriage Truth Wives

I recently gave a talk to a group of backpackers; they were on the edge of their seats.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language

Ways to Relieve Stress #10: Make up a language and ask people for directions.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Emotions Language

There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication Death Speech

The president of France said that the English are arrogant with their refusal to learn foreign languages; at least, I think that’s what he said… it all just sounded like “haw-he-haw-he-haw-he-haw.”

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication England Language Places

Never in the ring of human conflict have so few taken so much from so many.

American boxer
Boxing Sports Wordplay

How can there be self-help groups?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts.

(1812 – 1870) English novelist
Books Communication Reviews/Criticism