Subject: Communication » Wordplay

Through no fault of his own my uncle crashed his car into a lemon tree; he is still bitter and twisted.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

A day without sunshine is like, you know… night.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Communication Wordplay

Why do they call that funny little statue a bust when it stops right before the part of the body that it’s named after?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Art Communication Wordplay

Good girls go to heaven; bad girls go everywhere else.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Communication Wordplay

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Communication Wordplay

Archaeologist: A person whose career lies in ruins.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay

Nothing risqué nothing gained!

(1933 – 1967) American actress, entertainer & Hollywood sex symbol
Communication Sex Wordplay

The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one often comes from strong will, and the other from strong won’t.

(1813 – 1887) American clergyman, social reformer & abolitionist
Characteristics Wordplay

Polygamy – the art of  parrot-folding.

comic actor-writer
Communication Definitions Wordplay

Some people have a way with words, and other people… oh, uh, not have way.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Communication Wordplay

How can there be self-help groups?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Obesity is really widespread.

Appearance Fat Wordplay

Gentlemen prefer bonds.

(1855 – 1937) American lawyer, judge, banker & Secretary of Treasury
Communication Wordplay

Tissue: Your daily nosepaper.

Definitions Wordplay

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Entertainment Television Wordplay

Today’s subliminal thought is: …

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Five out of every three people have trouble understanding fractions.

(1927 – 2018) British comedian, singer & songwriter
Science/Weather Wordplay

Incest is relatively boring.

Family Sex Wordplay

Corduroy pillows: They’re making headlines!

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Things Wordplay

Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids.

Children Family Sex Wordplay

Obesity: A surplus gone to waist.

Appearance Body Definitions Fat Wordplay