Subject: Definitions (Page 57)

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Infidel: In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs Definitions Religion

Strip Teaser: One who makes a bare living.

Body Definitions Occupations

Anonymous: The worlds most popular author.

Definitions

Ventriloquist: A man who never speaks for himself.

Communication Definitions Speech

Lawsuit: A contest generally won by the party that can afford to reimburse the lawyers on both sides of the dispute.

Definitions Law Lawyers

Kidney: A complex organ used to convert beer into urine.

Beer Definitions Food/Drink

Kiss: A course of procedure, cunningly devised, for the mutual stoppage of conversation when words are superfluous.

(1863 – 1935) British-born American writer, artist & illustrator
Definitions

Giraffe: The highest form of animal life.

Animals Definitions Wordplay

Middle Age: That time of life when you'd rather not have a good time than recover from it. 

Age Definitions

Teacher: A disillusioned woman who used to think she liked children.

Children Definitions Education

Antiques: Furniture that is too old for poor folks but the right age for rich people.

Definitions Things

Intuition: The strange instinct that tells a woman she is right whether she is or not.

Definitions Women

Group Discussion: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Definitions

Conscience: The voice that tells you not to do something after you have done it.

Definitions

Vacation: A change of routine that makes you feel good enough to go back to work and poor enough to have to.

Definitions

Unitarian: One who denies the divinity of a Trinitarian.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs Definitions Religion

Genealogy: Chasing your own tale.

Definitions Family

Blurt: To speak the truth.

Definitions Speech

Small Town: A place where nothing happens every minute.

Definitions Places

Penicillin: What to give a man who has everything.

Definitions Health Wordplay

Motel: A love-inn.

Definitions