Subject: Entertainment (Page 15)

Knock knock jokes are completely wasted on the homeless.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Entertainment

[Art is] the reasoned derangement of the senses.

(1905 – 1982) American poet, translator & critical essayist
Art Entertainment

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show host.

(1947 – ) comedian & television host
Dance Entertainment

Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Art Definitions

It makes me look as if I were straining a stool.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Art Insults

Last night I did a benefit for the survivors of a benefit I had done the week before. – doing benefits

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Entertainment

An actor is the kind of guy who, if you ain't talking about him, ain't listening.

(1910 – 1984) American film producer & publicist
Acting Entertainment Occupations

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight?

disc jockey, screenwriter & humorist
Entertainment Television

Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Entertainment Men People

I Could Never Have Sex With Any Man Who Has So Little Regard For My Husband

(1936 – ) American author, screenwriter, journalist & playwright
Entertainment Film

Composers shouldn't think too much—it interferes with their plagiarism.

(1896 – 1983) American actor
Communication Entertainment Music Reading/Writing

They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian; well, they’re not laughing now.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Emotions Entertainment Laughter People

Acting is all about honesty and if you can fake that, you've got it made.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Acting Characteristics Entertainment Honesty

I dropped out of West Point to become a comedian… probably the greatest service I will ever do for my country.

(1955 – ) American comedian
America Entertainment Places

Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Appearance Body Dance People

I’ve performed for twelve presidents… and entertained six.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Entertainment People Self

My Comedy Channel – Fox News

My News Channel Comedy Central

Entertainment Signs Television

Beethoven always sounds to me like the upsetting of a bag of nails, with here and there also a dropped hammer.

(1819 – 1900) English art critic, social thinker, poet & artist
Entertainment Music Reviews/Criticism

I have high-definition television, because I felt the lack of resolution was affecting my ability to solve cases on C.S.I.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Entertainment Television

Art is long and life is short; here is evidently the explanation of a Brahms symphony.

Insults Music

You might be a redneck if… you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities People Rednecks Television