Subject: Food/Drink (Page 37)

There is one thing more exasperating than a wife who can cook and won’t, and that’s a wife who can’t cook and will.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Cooking Food/Drink Marriage Wives

We drink to one another’s health, and spoil our own.

(1859 – 1927) English writer
Food/Drink Health

He was a wise man who invented beer.

(427 BC – 347 BC) Greek author & philosopher
Beer Food/Drink

I’m not very domestic… for years my children though mold was a frosting.

(1951 – ) American author, playwright & lyricist
Cooking Food/Drink People Self

Well, you know, plants are living things, too; they're just easier to catch.

(1960 – ) American stand-up comedian & writer
Food/Drink

Fiber: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.

Definitions Eating Food/Drink

The English contribution to world cuisine – the chip.

(1939 – ) English actor, comedian, writer & producer
England Food/Drink Places

All other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer and we are drinking Barry Manilow.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Alcohol Beer Food/Drink

Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes.

(1921 – 2004) stand-up comedian & actor
Beer Food/Drink TV/Movie Quotes

Because you are feeding both the child and the floor, raising this child will be expensive.

(1937 – ) comedian & television actor
Children Family Food/Drink Money

What am I drinking? … NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Alcohol Food/Drink Health

On a traffic light green means go and yellow means yield, but on a banana, it’s just the opposite; green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means where the heck did you get that banana?

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink

Calorie: Basic measure of the amount of rationalization offered by the average individual prior to taking a second helping of a particular food.

Definitions Food/Drink

Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains.

author
Alcohol Food/Drink Science/Weather

It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it you’re adding raisins and marshmallows – it’s a rocky road.


Food/Drink

I love Grape Nuts – except, lots of times, I forget to put milk on them the night before I want to eat them.

American cinematographer & television director
Eating Food/Drink

In Scotland the forbidden fruit is fruit.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Food/Drink Places

If a drink was ice cold, it would be impossible to drink. Because it would be solid. “Here’s a drink, Mitch – it’s ice cold.” I guess I could lick it.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Food/Drink Situations

Whiskey: The best thing to take for a headache – the night before.

Alcohol Definitions Food/Drink

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.

(1937 – 2005) journalist & author
Alcohol Drugs Life Self

I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Activities Animals Food/Drink