Subject: Government » Politicians (Page 4)

My definition of a redundancy is an air bag in a politician's car.

(1931– 2012) American actor, producer & director

I have come to the conclusion that politics are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.

(1890 – 1970) French president, general & statesman

Dilemma: A politician trying to save both his faces at once.

You don’t listen to a guy who looks like the kid in ‘Deliverance’ all grown up.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright

My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician; and to tell the truth, there’s hardly any difference.

(1884 – 1972) 33rd U.S. president

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor.

(1912 – 2007) U.S. first lady, wife of Lyndon Johnson

A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides by governors.

[It’s] hard to become a billionaire in public office… legally, anyway.

(1928 – 2019) American business magnate a&d financier

The news of any politician’s death should be listed under ”Public Improvements.”

(1902 – 1963) Danish actor

Honest Politician: One who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Statesman: A politician who is held upright by equal pressure from all directions.

Fleas can be taught nearly anything a congressman can.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist

Politicians are the same all over; they promise to build a bridge even when there’s no river.

(1894 – 1971) Soviet premier

There is one sure way of telling when politicians aren't telling the truth — their lips move.

(1946 – ) English actress

Politicians are people who get sworn in and cursed out!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine

A politician will do anything to keep his job—even become a patriot.

(1863 – 1951) American newspaper magnate & politician

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist

Since a politician never believes what he says, he is quite surprised to be taken at his word.

(1890 – 1970) French president, general & statesman

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs.

(1790 – 1869) French writer, poet & politician

The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist

According to reports, President Bush and John Kerry have combined $23 million left over from the 2004 presidential campaign, while Ralph Nader recently discovered some old gum in his hair.

(1971 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer