Subject: Money

Debt means you had more fun than you were supposed to.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comedian, television writer/producer & radio host
Money

If men knew how to do it, they wouldn’t have to pay for it.

(1952 – ) comedian, actress & writer
Men Money People Sex

A crowded police docket is the surest of all signs that trade is brisk and money plenty.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Crime Government Money

When a person with experience meets a person with money, the person with experience will get the money and the person with the money will get some experience.

Money Murphy’s Laws

Donald Trump is not just a rich man, he’s what a hobo imagines a rich man to be.

(1982 – ) American comedian, actor, writer & producer
Money Wealth

Saving is a very fine thing; especially when your parents have it for you.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Money

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don’t know what he looks like.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Appearance Money

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Money

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Money Work

All warranty and guarantee clauses are rendered void on payment of the invoice.

Money Murphy’s Laws

The only thing I like about rich people is their money.

(1879 – 1964) British politician
Money People Wealth

A man who has a million dollars is as well off as if he were rich.

(1763 – 1848) German-American, first multi-millionaire in the U.S.
Money People Wealth

Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.

(1958 – ) Australian author
Art Entertainment Money

The only way not to think about money is to have a great deal of it.

(1862 – 1937) novelist & short story writer
Money Wealth

About the time we think we can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

(1929 – 1933) 31st U.S. president, humanitarian
Money

The Catholic Church is still very angry about The Da Vinci Code… they don’t like anything that makes more money in a weekend than they do.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Entertainment Film Money

The Englishman who has lost his fortune is said to have died of a broken heart.

(1803 – 1882) essayist, poet, & philosopher
Emotions England Money People Places Wealth

The more an item costs, the farther you have to send it for repairs.

Money Murphy’s Laws

There is only one word for aid that is genuinely without strings, and that word is blackmail.

(1902 – 1977) Scottish journalist & author
Money

Stock Market: A popular game of chance in which moneyed speculators gamble with the nation’s economy, the object being to amass as much unearned income as possible before one’s fellow gamblers withdraw from the game and precipitate a nationwide depression.

Definitions Money

If a man works like a horse for his money, there are a lot of girls anxious to take him down the bridal path.

(1922 – 2018) comedian & actor
Marriage Money Work